A stinker

She followed after him into the lobby, the report held firmly in her hands. The company’s fortunes were on the upswing and yet her job hadn’t been made permanent. The day couldn’t end soon enough for her to tackle him again. He would be off on a foreign trip in a week’s time. This time it would be for an entire month.

Was he trying to avoid her? Need to find out if Susie is going to accompany him. So far, no one had a clue, nothing unusual rather his style of working.

 Last night he had come to her apartment after nearly a month. An argument had ensued.

“Is there something going on between you and Susan?”

 He got up to the small drink bar she had set up just for him. Pouring himself a glass of scotch, barely able to contain his irritation in his voice, “She is my assistant, a new hand, you know that very well.”

Taking a swig, gestured wildly at her” Stop your nagging woman, what are you? My wife?”

 Wouldn’t want to open a can of worms, not would we? “That doesn’t answer my question?”

“Does no answer it?”

“Why was she all over you at the party?”

“”Just harmless flirting, like Dev does with you.” winking at her “Do I scream and interrogate?”

“He is different, he knows I am taken.”

 “Taken?” his head shooting up from the lower shelf of the fridge, banging it against the open door in the process.

“Damn you woman, won’t let a man drink in peace.” He grunted, rubbing the tender spot.

“Let me see that, does it hurt? Could be a concussion”  “Go and sit down, I‘ll get the salad.”

“Get some ice too.”

“Where did you buy these?” looking at the two corked champagne bottles.

 “The usual, Uncle gifted them to Pa, you know, he can’t drink anymore after the heart attack.”

“Mom gave it to me to throw away.”

He eyed her speculatively, “And you brought them over. Smart girl.”

“Not smart as your Susie” she pouted, his one word question from earlier rankling her.

Was he trying to deny their two year relationship? Jealous and anger reared their ugly heads again.

He has a way with women and knew from her expression, the situation had to be salvaged,

Pulling her over, murmuring the usual trite words, she so loved to hear, he managed to improve her mood. It was enough to be allowed to spend the night on her bed.

She was easy to manipulate, that’s why he kept her around.

As he dressed up the next morning, Susan curvy body flashed before his eyes.

The thrill of a new conquest was what he lived for, but this one was shrewd and self confident to fall for his silken webs. He needed to plan; the trip would be the ideal way to connect. He had carefully kept everyone out of the loop except Susan. As he looked in the kitchen where Mouly was preparing their breakfast, he knew he had to keep her satisfied, just in case…

cwc 515 unfinished

Destiny foretold

Amir fidgeted.

The dwelling talks disturbed him, increasing with Sagina’s worried looks.

He was loath to leave their only home, the world outside baffled his simple mind.

‘Did he have a choice? He had sworn to the tree spirits to protect his sisters with his life.’

‘Go check on her. Keep your tongue coiled.”

Sagina frowned; silent words betrayed her open mouth. She was a Bora woman, never speaking their minds.

He was ashamed of the leaders, all save his father.

She had been a barter of risk for the expensive, useful gifts her father sent every full moon. Two such moons had passed. The gifts didn’t arrive nor word from the river clan. They debated sending her back or selling her off to another tribe.

 He unsheathed his new scimitar, slicing it through invisible enemies. They hadn’t made much headway with her lessons. Mastering the letters had seemed fair exchange for self defense techniques, sadly turning out as one way assimilation.

The sounds of running feet had him colliding with his sister and servant as he lifted the flap.

“Can’t find her anywhere…she’s gone.’

“Get a grip, search thoroughly.”

“No one's seen her at the breakfast langar, master.”

“Must be with the children.”

“Hasn’t visited them in the last three days.”

“Ready my horse. I leave immediately.”

“Where to?”

“The forest, she wanders into.”

“Pack our bags before we return, a long journey awaits us.”

“And mine, brother?”

“No, your place is here.”

The lonely figure trudged its way into the forest. The footfalls unwittingly leaving a trail behind. She had been abandoned twice. The memories of her biological family a blip, that of her foster home painfully fresh.

‘An orphan's life would have been better.’

The overhead words rebounded among the strange looking trees.

‘Was it true? It’s obvious; I am no tribeswoman but a clan member…’

Her curiosity had her following impressionable Sagina last night. Suspecting a lover’s tryst, she had chosen to gather proof Amir would need before he believed her. The soft, jingling steps ahead, falling on the gravel in front of the green columns of men’s tents intrigued and scared her.

 The poisonous sentences lent weight to her recurrent doubts. Her world turned on itself.

Born to the clan whose magic resided in the names of the children, the one written in the runes cast, made her dangerous. Her father and the seer had tried in vain to protect her secret. A betraying uncle, three raids on the outpost had the council scurrying to get rid of the abomination.

She was sent off to live as a six year old with the Boras, the warrior tribe that lived on the fringes of the old forest. They treated her better than their women. She had a tutor.

‘Must have been the gifts.’

The Boras never ventured into the forest, beyond defined limits. The tree spirits they worshipped lived deep inside. The feared Maitri, the mages of the wild made it their abode.

She began to catch the change in landscape; scarred, broken trees like her spirit filled her vision. Seductive voices whispered and pulled her to the clearing. Before her was a stone dwelling with three chairs in stone carved with human bones, a red stool near one.

“Turn back child.” a voice warned.

“Fear not, little one. Join us, embrace your destiny.” crooned one of the earlier ones.

She stood still, while the voices battled until one was silenced forever.

Amir galloping fast, reached, only to watch in horror as ghostly, gnarled hands nudged her forward.

“Stop, come with me.”

“Leave now; the Boras will live to see another day.”

“Not without her.”

 He rushed forward, to be thrown back by the magical barriers.

“Kali, listen to me. They are dangerous, they are the Maitri.”

She turned around, awakening from a dream. Stared at the grey figures, then at him. Sad eyes appealed to him.

“Go, brother, before they hurt you.”

“Before I truly become – Kali the destroyer.”

 He inched forward, unheeding, hacking at the invisible walls. Only to find; an empty square and earth scorched to the darkest black.

‘He wouldn’t rest. Would search the ends of the world till he found her.’

The clan would be the first stop. Despite his contempt, he needed them.

Forgotten Tales Series 1

A short Summary : This is a series of stories on "the ordinary women" whose lives are/were interconnected, some more - some less....they are based on one or more events that affected/changed their lives...

The stories are true as far as the basic plot  goes....the rest of the wordplay is the author's portrayal....

Apologies to any one who finds her story here....

A Blow From The Past 

She stood on the long corridor undecided, a vacant stare at nothing in particular. Totally oblivious to the glances of the ladies passing her by which, would have on any other day infuriated her.....not even the activities on the busy street below caught her attention. It was the fourth day of her stay here and she was already regretting it. The impulsive act that had led her to her current situation...standing outside dingy, dim rooms and surrounded by noisy, nosy neighbours.

Home seemed bigger all of a sudden....She would be sipping her tumbler of flavoured milk before beginning her late afternoon chores. Her duties varied from day to day, most days involved drying clothes in the backyard before going to school, folding them neatly on returning, pestle and mortar grinding of coffee powder and other ingredients needed for the meal in the evening. On other days helping the ladies of the house take stock of and arrange the groceries in the store room, baby sitting her younger siblings and cousins. Though the work was monotonous and tiring, she took pride in a job well done. Home that meant siblings and cousins who lived under the same roof with whom she shared many happy moments, who would miss her. Chatting and sharing a laugh with friends who walked the 3 kms to school and back with her. Tears rolled down silently at the thought of not seeing them again, defeated, she blew her nose noisily and went back to staring.

Whilst lost in these thoughts she spied the figures approaching the chawl (a large tenement house) that seemed hauntingly familiar...One of them with drooping shoulders and a dazed gait, walking at some distance behind the others was the one she was well acquainted with. The two who comprised the middle of the little group wore gritty expressions. They were led by a scowling policeman in mufti (without the uniform), instantly recognisable. He had, after all, been her neighbour for the past few days. He must have been the one who had gotten in touch with them. He had displayed scepticism at the story on her sudden appearance at Vivek’s place.

He had turned up at dinner on her second day there. Vivek told her that it was his usual routine when his sister was around. The orphans looked on him as their father figure with their maternal uncle away for more than six months in a year, on the merchant ship that he worked in. He had mistaken her for Vivek’s sister as her back was turned to the flimsy curtain that hung on the doorway. She was busy, preparing the meagre meal in the square that served as the kitchen... when he called out.

“Sureka, when did you come?”
She had turned, startled by the sudden voice, almost dropping the ladle. Vivek had come out running of the small room on the right that served as the bedroom.
“Who is she, haven’t seen her before?” Constable Vel asked curiously.
“A distant relative, her parents are in the village, she wanted to see one of the film shooting here.”
“A runaway or did her parents really give her permission?”
“They were tired of her constant pestering and sent her hoping her curiosity will be satisfied.” He tried to sound convincing, lying not really his forte.
While Vivek kept silent throughout the meal. Vel subtly asked her questions on her life, which she tried to answer based on her annual vacation to her ancestral village.

As she recollected that fateful day, instead of fear, she felt relieved on seeing the two grim faced men she had known for as long as she could remember. She would have shuddered in their presence in normal circumstances. She felt a pang of guilt and remorse at the sad face that lagged behind. But the 16 year old have enough of the adventure ....she wanted to go home....”Would they take her back or not?” she wondered pensively. Her Uncle was the one to approach her, her father having stayed back with Vel.....terse words uttered with a curt glance in her direction "Gather your belongings and come down in 10 minutes!" She looked around the room, nothing much to pack except her old school bag and uniform. The clothes that she wore had been bought by him. Quickly putting together everything, she ran down the steps three at a time....halted momentarily at the first landing when she saw Vivek’s forlorn gaze.

He worked it the bookstore near her school to fund his college education and had found her crying outside the shop one day. She had lost the money given to buy a new notebook and had been afraid of being scolded by the teacher and her father alike. He had taken pity on her, having seen her pass by almost every day for the past two years. He bought her a book out of his account, which she accepted gratefully. She promised to pay back when she had enough pocket money saved. A few casual conversations turned into a tentative friendship. She stopped by the shop every now and then as there were very few customers at that particular time, the owner turning up only in the mornings. Her two best friends waited patiently, often teasing her on the journey back home.

She started lying to family members, telling them she was out visiting friends when she met him secretly in the nearby unused building that no one visited. He would talk about his dreams for himself and his sister, about their idyllic life when his parents, small landowners in the nearby village were still alive. They had died in bus accident while returning from a wedding. He had been 12 and had to mature overnight. She spoke of her family, the restrictions, her lack of interest in studies, her skill at painting which was largely overlooked as a frivolous pastime. He encouraged her to continue painting on seeing a few watercolours, introduced her to a whole new world of modern music and books while she admired his quiet intelligence and his endurance. Time flew by when they were together as they discussed their dreams and aspirations

She had often felt isolated; a lonely, eldest child. He had befriended her, made her feel wanted, worthy. But she realised it was not enough....running away had been a necessity then....yet another failed test result meant beatings and punishment. He had been there then, bringing her to his home, sheltering her from her father’s caning. She would never forget his kindness... But she had to go...make him understand.

“We belong to two different worlds, it is best we don’t leave it this way and part as friends.
When he protested vehemently, “Don’t try to contact me, it will only hurt more.” she said, choosing a white lie.
She didn't love him; she had been in love with the idea. She realised it had been more for him but chose to ignore the hurt and pain he was sure to feel at her abrupt abandonment.

Back to where her heart belonged she was in a state of bliss. But the momentary happiness evaporated when she felt a chill in the air that hadn't been there before...no one said anything to her, her mother and aunt glad to see her alive and safe. But she felt eyes behind her back, hushed whispers of neighbours and relatives...School was a place out of bounds, her father had spoken to her just that once to convey his negative reply at her pleading, The one refuge she could escape the stifling restrictions of home to, was forever lost to her.

She wondered why she was reminiscing now, after decades of blissful forgetfulness.....married off to the first alliance possible the very next year, once the scandal was deemed to have become old news...life had never gotten easy for the recently turned the grandmother of three...she had paid for that youthful mistake in more ways than countable, her husband iron handed behaviour proof that he had an essential knowledge of her infamous escapade...and yet had been content with the little joys that surprised her now and then, her two sons and a daughter who made live worth living.

The name in the magazine she was browsing through had triggered the journey into the past. A past that had been locked safe for long in the hearts of elders, her younger cousin who had never judged her, rather commiserated, his and her own...his name, she had once deemed as melodious as his voice was all that she thought she remembered of him. Yet the picture of the professor who had been awarded the community prize for his contribution to the education of women had to be his. She was glad that life had been kinder to him, a first in many years, noting sadly that it made no mention of any family other than his sister’s. She gently, absentmindedly retraced his face on the paper while the garlanded portrait of her husband watched on from the wall behind. She quickly put away the magazine into the bedside drawer as the voice of her elder son returning from his trip pulled her back to the present, the mask back in place.

 word count 1550

Amazon Reviews And Self/Indie Publishing - IWSG

 The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day for participating blog owners who may be professional or amateur writers. (All you need is the passion and output, published or not). Started by Alex Cavanaugh the author of the sci-fi space opera CassaStar and sequel CassaFire, it is a means for writers to talk about their fears big and small. It is also an opportunity to connect to other writers who may have conquered these or are sailing in the same insecure boat as you.

No cribbing about cranky muse (after all, she is a part of me), no tears and nose cleaning noises over rejections...because something else piqued my interest and well enough to grace this post :
The syndrome called Amazon Book Reviews.

By songsnwords | View this Toon at ToonDoo | Create your own Toon

Every writer knows the value of reviews either in the form of critique or comments. And the indie press and self published authors especially first timers value its weight in platinum. 
From my observations over the last couple of months...there are three categories of people involved.
1. The real ones read book lovers who may be bloggers or otherwise whose 2/3/4 and occasional 1 and 5 stars are genuine as are their words.
2. The ones with no real names and a couple of reviews all of which are 1 stars with really nasty comments, blatantly calling indie/self published as crap and demolishing the story as a middle grader's attempt. Some subtly accuse the author of purchasing four and five stars...you know what, that's the trick used by many to get a top review rank as more buyers vote these comments as useful.
3. Unfortunately, the second group is not entirely wrong. A technique of paying people for glowing reviews polished into an art by a self publisher and many more like him...check out these links to know more. They viciously attack the first group when 1 or 2 stars are given by the latter.
Don’t Trust Amazon Reviews: They’re Fake

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/20/technology/finding-fake-reviews-online and a downloadable report by Cornell University researchers on it.

So, where does it leave us as writers, readers and genuine reviewers?
Will the tirade against "not from Big 6 stable" and shoddy, typos ridden work uploaded hurt good indie authors in the long run?
Even the free samples quite often disguise an ebook not worth the money (Trust me, I have seen my screen seethe in agony, I wouldn't review them here since this isn't a book blog, and because of a self imposed rule of showcasing 3 stars and above books.)  Should a reader avoid Amazon reviews and rely on word of mouth or book bloggers to find new authors, try only bloggers' books or stick to reliable paperbacks?
Does a reviewer like me refrain from posting on Amazon since my 4 and 5 stars may be overlooked or considered fixed more so in case of free books received for review?

If the cartoon didn't make you laugh, these should:
1. Random Rejection Generator which has 7 rejections letters delivered to your email to develop thick skin.
I choose the nastiest option, here goes...
Dear Writer,

If we had the budget, we would hire one of the crews that cleans up toxic. Super fund sites to visit your office and expunge all evidence of your attempts at writing. Perhaps we will apply for a federal grant. We’ll let you know.

Regards,
The Editors

2. A Tshirt for writers:

Book Releases
Today is the official release date of Fighting Gravity, book two of the Gravity series - science fiction romance by a blogger friend Cherie Reich (check sidebar).
To purchase: Amazon  Amazon UK  Amazon DE  Amazon FR Amazon IT  Amazon ES  Smashwords 

If you join her author newsletter, you can receive a coupon from Smashwords to download Fighting Gravity for free!

To celebrate Fighting Gravity's release date, Defying Gravity, book one of the Gravity trilogy, is now free through May 4th. So if you haven't snagged a copy, then please do.

I am reading Defying Gravity and enjoying it so far. 

While you are at it, don't forget M.Pax's book release party for the first book of her science fiction series The Backworlds from May
7-10 (check the sidebar once again).

Some Interesting Book Tours And Giveaways I Came Across

Wistful Nebulae: Gala Hop: G ala H op is the AtoZ way of announcing the launch party for the first book in my new space opera series, The Backworlds . Book#1 of  the series...


Epic Ninja Giveaway To celebrate 1500 followers, Alex is holding a giveaway – a copy of CassaStar and CassaFire! to donate to your public/high school library.

Badass Bookie: (Storm is COMING Blog Tour) + Giveaway ( Int'l): A Storm is coming! Over the next week, forecasts are predicting a massive Storm front progressing steadily across the Southern blogosphe...

Blog Tour: Whisper of Memory - Guest Post + Giveaway : chances to win a Kindle

RandomMusings For The Day #47 and Some Verses Thrown In

How is it that despite child proofing your home to the best of your abilities, they find a way to injure themselves??

Decadent thoughts blight

the once beautiful

Life's rewards for 

 the faithful's watch.

Floating on dark, gloomy

 waters of humanity

A constant struggle 

against the inevitable sinking.

Pressures, now stilled

rechanneled to naively targets

This bloated carnival

awaits the recycling order.

* The poem's inspired by a fantastic picture found Here in Dreamstime.

Waiting for Some Inter Dimensional Romance - A Book Review

The Waiting Booth - Brinda Berry

Publishers Etopia Press  

Genre - Speculative Fiction - Fantasy/Paranormal/  Young Adult - Romance
Ebook - 186 pages, Price $ 5.99
Available at Amazon Kindle Store

Blurb:

Mia has one goal for her senior year at Whispering Woods High--find her missing older brother. But when her science project reveals a portal into another dimension, she learns that travelers are moving in and out of her woods in the most alarming way and government agents Regulus and Arizona are policing their immigration. Mia’s drawn to the mysterious, aloof Regulus, but it’s no time for a crush. She needs to find out what they know about her brother, while the agents fight to save the world from viral contamination. But when Regulus reveals that he knows Mia’s secrets, she begins to wonder if there’s more going on than she thought...and if she was wrong to trust him...

This is a debut novel by the author Brinda Berry in the young adult – fantasy category. The protoganist Mia has a neurological condition, synaesthesia where the mixing of the senses enables her to see colors within sounds, smells, and words. 
The story begin in a calm, everyday manner with high schooler Mia’s interaction with a busy but protective father, musings over her missing elder brother Pete and her science project in the woods adjoining their rather secluded home. Austin and Em are Mia's best friends, though Austin would like to trade the friend tag for something more, something Mia can’t see him as.
It is the chance photographing of seemingly shady characters Regulus and Arizona that hurtles her into a far secretive, deceptive and at times dangerous world beyond the ordinary. She is literally pushed into the other dimension in her part of the woods with Regulus and Arizona turning out to be “enforcers” with an inter-dimensional monitoring agency IIA.
Their apparent knowledge of her brother and their story makes them trustworthy but a series of incidents and interactions with her project mentor threatens to change everything to a point where she doesn't know whom to trust.
The primary characters, Mia and Regulus are strong and vulnerable in their own way. Their romance is slow given their initial and subsequent meetings and picks up in a subtle manner as the story unfolds .
The secondary ones like Arizona and Austin whom we may see more of in the later books,  shine through with humour and risk taking loyalty respectively.
The concept of portals which I expected to reveal an alien world but unveils a totally different one was a great move by the author. The act of betrayal at the end is again unexpected though the way the scenes are incorporated left me with an unsettled feeling as a reader. Maybe, the next book will expand on it and make it clearer.
There are sweet romantic moments towards the end which fall in the sweet category of romance rating - Sweet -> Hot -> Spicy.
I give this a 4.2 rating. 
Overall I enjoyed the book and would recommend it to lovers of YA fantasy that is not based on magic.


I received a copy for review through the group Knights of the Round Table on Goodreads. 


Personal Disclaimer: Though this book was a free copy received for the purpose of review, the post in entirety is my basic impression after reading the book. It is not based on intervention by the author, publishing house or the book forum.

Time To Change - Tap the 'Humane' In Us?

She sat there sweating profusely, her temper matching the heat outside. Would this too turn out to be a failed attempt? The pressure from the officials had been mounting. New mouths to feed arrived at a steady pace every month, eating into her share of the allocated funds. Being the head of the orphanage was not a lucrative business any more. She was tired of pandering to the egos of higher ups and soliciting new clients for her husband's floundering real estate business at the same time. The dingy room saw less and less of her as days passed by.


 Rama Shankar* pushed his way through the wooden saloon doors, he didn't bother to knock. 
 If she hadn't been preoccupied, would have noticed the smug look that permeated his features these days. "The Pandeys called, Madamji."
"Again? Bringing her...Munni back?" Desperation reducing her voice to a hoarse croak.
"Who tells this poor man anything?" His voice always reminded her of grease scrapped from a steel plate.
 Must want to wash their hands off her. These religious, middle class ones are all the same, just empty talk. "What did you tell them?"
 "The usual, busy with inspection work." He seemed pleased with his lies. His eyes had a hazy quality to them. Had he been...? "How many times have I told you to stay off bhang during working hours?
"Do you want to lose this job too?"
With watering eyes, he quickly prostrated before her, "Have mercy on me, family man, my kids will starve to death." adding, "These kids are like my children, they need me."


He managed to convince her every time; she needed him to cover up her absence. She was about to give him another last warning when the noise outside distracted her. There was a flurry of running feet followed by steadier ones. Snippets of conversation in loud and soft voices could be heard. The rushing feet stopped at her door. Utter silence. The door swung wildly as burly policemen swooped into her space. 
 Two scared looking attendants along with a dozen children of different ages waited just outside the threshold. The Pandeys and a few other parents stood next to an important looking official. The collector and here? 
Munni? Why does she have a glum face?  Looking at the cowering ten year old who stood between her adoptive parents, a familiar sense of something amiss hit her. Something had happened, she was the one scared now. Putting on a brave face, hiding the tremor in her tone and turning to Baldev Singh, the inspector she recognised, "What is the meaning of this, Baldevji?"


Baldev turned to the collector who gave him an impatient nod.  He looked at her sadly. She was a decent woman and yet it had to be done. "Arrest warrants for you and this man here." pointing to the peon who was staring at Munni with a dazed look. 
"Arrest Warrant?" she repeated, bewildered.
"For the rape of Munni and four other minor girls adopted from the orphanage. There are also charges by some of the attendants," looking towards the door, "of being molested." 
"There must some mistake, surely, I would be aware of such happenings." 


"If you had been around and had bothered to notice the obvious signs." Pandeyji spoke for the first time. "We found blood stains on our daughter's clothes. She would't eat properly, woke up screaming every night, woudn't even let my brother hug her.
"One of my neighbours who is a child specialist felt that she had undergone recent trauma. A physical examination by an expert left us with no doubt. My daughter found the courage to tell us everything that happened to her here. So did the other girls." affectionately patting his daughter on her head. "Can we go home, daddy?" Munni asked softly.
"Come on, Baldev, take them into custody. We have to move the remaining children to a safer place, we haven't all day." The collector shook hands with the team and the parents before walking towards the other children.


* This is a work of fiction though it's based on ground reality. Names used are purely coincidental and bear no resemblance to those living or dead.

Children are our future, more so girls - the nurturers of such future...If protectors turn monsters, where do they go? Please love, protect and cherish them.

This post is written for the contest Stayfree-Time To Change on IndiBlogger

Declining, The Better Way? Disinclination - Worrying Factor? - IWSG

The first Wednesday of every month is officially Insecure Writer’s Support Group day for participating blog owners who may be professional or amateur writers. (All you need is the passion and output, published or not). Started by Alex Cavanaugh the author of the sci-fi space opera CassaStar and sequel CassaFire, it is a means for writers to talk about their fears big and small. It is also an opportunity to connect to other writers who may have conquered these or are sailing in the same insecure boat as you.


No cartoons this time, humour may or may not make an appearance. I started writing again 1 1/2 years ago. Happy to post my best pieces (you can beg to differ, no sweat) on my blog, being new to the chances in the publishing world, especially online. I realised albeit 5 months back, in Nov 11 that the tiny (OK, huge, colossal...I get the point) lack of knowledge meant that 75% of my work is now unfit for online publication, even if less than a dozen souls have read each of the works. 
Then I wrote some more,  submitted, followed by the rejections. Most were standard - we can't use it now, doesn't fit  in our style and so on kinds. The first one in Dec 11 made me cry for an hour...but the thick skin developed over time. 
Until two things happened, back to back.
 A poetry of mine got brutally dissected by three editors of an Ezine with comments like too general, can't understand the point, unreadable style.

Silent prayers for

success that eludes.
Journey back and forth
on an ever changing road.
Doing whatever it takes

to make time stop still,

if only for a few moments
to gather baggage and quilt.

Trudge across the finishing line,
the one, that loves playing vile tricks,

further down the road, it forever, spins.

Proclaim myself victorious,

to find, obstacles strewn across, 

newer, stronger, unexpected

Blasphemous messages to ancestors gone,

Unheard.

The mocking Gods roll over in mirth,

pointing at this "puny human" in distress.

Then a unfamiliar blogger writer added insult to injury by not just calling out to my punctuation (that's fine, I look out for genuine critique anyway) but dissed my self respect by sending me, without the courtesy of prior intimation, a 'not asked for' ebook on punctuation along with a left-handed compliment.
 I may be a struggling writer even a bad one but I can buy my own books, thank you!
Free books, good ones, I love them, who doesn't? - but that's what giveaways, contests, review forums, author approved/publisher or site sponsored  'free book' promotions are for.

Strangely, both have made me question my writing skills. As of now, I write because it's literally my lifeline in a lonely world, but publication is no longer my goal. 

 Which brings us to the title, is it better to get standard rejections? Is disinclination a death knell for my passion?


On the bright side, I am still going to create a free Smashwords chapbook of some my poetry pieces in June as a birthday gift to myself.
Much brighter, I am slowly getting out of the anaemic phase with my haemoglobin count going up. Hopefully, the clean bill of health, the magical 11.5 will come in a couple of months. Till then, my parents will have to bear the tired, irritable, forgetful Rek.
 Till then, my sensitive stomach will have to put with the iron and folate pills...sigh.
The brightest, next month's  IWSG will see a positive post, even a humourous one if I can pull it.


For the ones who still visit , a self created joke - do pamper the sick even if it isn't funny...
Why would vampires avoid the 'synthesised blood' banks?
 They prefer the organic variety to plastic.

RandomMusings For The Day #46

Is addiction really such a bad thing? Dark chocolate for weight loss, red wine in moderation for the heart, brain puzzles to stave off dementia, writing memes to keep the creative juices flowing, ezine rejections for staying humble(poor) and the A-Z for an excuse to bring the old Olympus out. ;)

p.s. I am rejoining the A-Z but only with my 'ready to post' pictures on my photo blog, well, so far have 20 of them.