Scarred

Chapter 1 - The Refrain


1
"Thond dhoney, Parsa karney, aangool"*...
The musical notes wafted through, every other morning from the bathroom. Like Beethoven's Concerto...the tempo changed over the next ten minutes reaching a crescendo with the litany of accusations and filthy words directed at her, her extended family, his friends and colleagues. 
 Despite her best efforts, she didn't always succeed in blocking out the stream of words. 'Words' which riled her temper make her scream back her own versions, which was one of the reasons he kept at it...rather enjoyed would be a better word, she had realised a while back . His face that grew ugly and dark while uttering them, his eyes that moved deeper into the sockets leaving most of the whites visible were the cues.
Sometimes, she felt nothing, just a numbed existence...as though an out of body experience or seen through someone else's vision. Often felt like a dead soul trapped in a living body that didn't quite feel alive.
At times, she just to sleep and never wake up to see the morning sun. it hadn't always been like this, not during the one month of official courtship and the first two months of marriage...'window dressing' he had told her later on, blasely at that.


*'Brush teeth, take a leak, bathe'


 Chapter 4


1

Shadows crept across the wall. Lights from the opposite buliding streaming in through the thin  curtains. The night lamp, not to be outdone added to the effects…so quiet, she could hear the heart palpitate against her chest walls.

Taking a deep breath, she picked up the thin brush, mixed the colours on the palette and carefully painted the petals.

‘Bitchy Prostitute’ the voice echoed, stronger than it had all week. She barely manged to pull away the shaking brush. The leaf was now shaded orange.

‘Damn!  Get a grip.’ It kinda looked nice’,  she noted with concentrated effort…autumn leaves on the blouse would stand out indeed. She glanced at the clock on the wall to her right, 12.45 a.m…half an hour more before she tried to sweet talk  the mistress of dreams.

Lost in the swirling colours that came alive in her hands, she barely heard him till he stepped close to her. Laughed at her efforts,”Well, Picasso, get back to bed.”

“ A few minutes more” the timid voice pleaded.

“You know who is up at this time of the night?”

Emboldened “Not that word, I will really leave this time.”

“Really? Poor Mrs Virgin, pity your  face didn’t find any takers in college. We both know, your parents will send you right back.” walking away.

Ignoring the rolling tears, blurred eyes sought the brush… clutching it tightly, in its strength everything faded.

2000 words in paper to be copied...sigh

Epilogue


She paused at the doorstep...looking back at the room  once more. Everything was as she had left it  two months ago....the curtains, the dining table she begged and begged for months and finally got, her favourite couch rich blue with silver trimmings, a favourite with the only three neighbours who passed his test (well most of the time at least).

          The light blue sofa still stood, a mute majestic witness to the torment sessions, mental and emotional, countless endured to the point of a breakdown, the humiliations, the constant put downs that still sent cold shivers down her spine.

         His high pitched voice with a maniac quality echoed in her brain, cold swept all over her, the heart pounding at an inhuman rate...the well recognised  signs of a panic attack. She took deep breathes the way her doctor has taught her, clutched a chair for support and moved to gather her few precious belongings, a culmination of six wasted years.

          Every piece of cloth, a book here, a C.D there, remainders of the few happy moments she had managed to gather and salvage from the wreck that was her marriage. Her bags packed, she glanced at the house for one last time ....

        The house she had tried in vain to make a home but dimly realised now was never hers to begin with. The house now stood for only loss : loss of innocence, loss of her unborn child, loss of hope, loss of dignity, loss of self worth and the greatest loss, one that would haunt her for years to come, loss of the will to live.

       The lift stopped , her and bags deposited to the ground floor, the safety zone...as she turned to hug and wave at her few friends, the only ones that would miss her...never him, never him..

       She saw at last in the afternoon sun....behind her stood the skyscraper tall, looming and lonely ....before her stood her mother and the cab, her ticket to freedom bought at a bitter price.


         She walked with a spring in her step, a tiny smile, a smile none the less that threatened to break out of the gloom, knowing that though the road ahead was not easy, too many battles still to be fought.... He could never hurt her again.....

Restless

Story Outline

"Some things never change around here." Simi poked around trying to fish out the harried souls.

The souls in question seeking solace from the stern elders, often alone or in groups of two and three by the lake.

'Sharing secrets inside the mansion walls was both embarrassing and dangerous' opined the teenagers.

This bunch was not smarter than the ones in the preceding years but used a different system of disguises. Hard to know if the portly, middle aged man she detected was indeed Shammi Uncle.

'Offending a senior member of the household meant hanging off a cliff like... Ria...
what the hell was that?'

***

Shammi replied “The Green Dew.”

Simi looked at him, a fear and question in her eyes as the others looked to the edge.

Ria or her lack thereof forgotten.

“Gather your clan children here,  protect them all.”  Time to seek his estranged warrior brothers, their very existence at stake.

***

He paced across the floor, impatiently awaiting the messenger’s return.

‘The fool of an imp must have left the mansion four hours ago, can’t these useless fools do one thing right?’

He dismissed his personal aide with a flick of the hand, causing the poor creature to crash onto the cold stone floor outside the room.

The crystal revealed nothing as yet.

‘The ancients had set strong wards…but not for long.’

The curse was almost ready. The final words of the mantra left, to be uttered on the blue moon night, two days hence.

Hidden by him in the old walls 150 years ago, it slumbered waiting the unleashing of its dark potency.

“Only the mad old bat knows where…”

He chuckled loudly, scaring the Bagoons in the cages.

She had played her part well, all these years, and would soon be rewarded for her loyalty.

They would be ‘The Lord of the lands and his consort.’ with all the high born crushed under his heels.

The Council had exiled him over his dark aides as they called them. In reality, he knew that they were scared and envious of his newly acquired powers. The spineless cowards had been unwilling to break the ancient oath and grab at everlasting glory, proclaiming truth and light as the greatest gifts.

‘He would show them the meaning of greatness, true power.’

 A scrap at the open roof grabbed his attention, the vulture glided down, encircling the clustered room.

Casting a quick, non verbal spell; transformed the scavenger into the hideous shape of his slave.

Trembling hands handed him the silk scroll wrapped up in protective Kusha grass.

‘Remove the grass blanket!’ he thundered, pulling away his hand as though it had been singed.

If things went well, the hated Charis’, Shaks’ and Warriers’, in particular, would be graced by an ancient visitor on the next moonless night. The Green Dew would bring with it, this time, the Elder Borns’ decimation. 

***
My muse is keen on a romantic twist, she refuses to cooperate otherwise so this stays as first chapter for now. ;(


Tentative Chapter 1 -  Going Back

 1

The day faded into the dark cloudy sky. So much like her dreams and hopes that were pushed into the farthest recesses of her mind. Often, she sat on the parapet in that corridor and gazed at the crowd around her. Some faces looked back at her with the familiarity of shared time, some recognising her as one they often passed by on their way to and back from. There were few that barely acknowledged her person except to taunt and tease. But even they were forced to retreat and seek other avenues of amusement...for today, she was oblivious. Her thoughts were thousands of miles away where her heart lay still, broken and shattered on that carpeted floor of a place that had once been a second home. Maybe Fazia swept away those invisible pieces in a single, mindless motion under the carpet. Pity broken hearts did not bleed, even magical ones...else someone would have noticed the faint red stains; red, not blue like some still liked to believe.

 The envelope in her hand, a beautiful one at that, artistic like the sender and yet it held the destructive powers of an atomic bomb. Courage that she had been gathering for the last two hours, to open and read the contents of the card eluded her. Words that could well turn out to be the final nail on the coffin of her dreams. She had been prepared for this moment from the evening she had fled that room. These three years had been difficult and yet strangely, fulfilling for her.

 2

 The rejection still ringing in her ears. She took perverse pleasure in that mocking tone, for that was the only way she could hear his voice.

The real memories too painful to look back into. Zeenat’s betrayal had rankled as she saw her in his embrace. But time had helped her see the truth…she was the one at fault, clutching at straws and being in love with someone whose heart had already been claimed. If only she had known, the countless times she had bored Zeenie with her tale of unrequited longing, she had been confiding her deepest secrets to the one he loved and who returned his affection. Humiliation and guilt had prevented her from saying her goodbyes; she had taken the cowardly way out of a letter. In a snap of a few minutes she had lost two of her beloved friends and many of her family. Another memory flickered of a day when her heart still beat, wildly at that.

“The Shakhs often marry close cousins, don’t they?’ she had asked casually, once.

He had just smiled as Zarine answered, “I am living proof.”

 She had been secretly thrilled at the thought that they were third generation cousins.

Little did her foolish day dreams permit her to see beyond the illusions, every glance, every smile which fell her way had been for the other one. The One, who had been their companion from childhood. 

Often nowadays she laughed aloud at her mistakes, which in turn evoked more glances from the students who passed by. One too many made; the worst had been confessing her feelings to him. The laughter which dissolved into hot tears as she glanced at the shiny paper in her hand.

 3

“Aren't you going to open it? It is getting crushed under the weight of your hands.”

She turned around, to see a smiling Ced seated next to her, his long legs dangling awkwardly.

One of her best friends, he wasn’t the kind to laugh at her pain. The special bond they shared enabled him to be attuned to her emotional and mental state of mind. Puzzled at his behaviour, she remained silent. But the tears had stopped, his very presence giving her strength.

Ced waited, patience one of his many virtues. When it looked unlikely that she would utter a word or open the envelope whose true contents he was aware of, he pulled it away gently from her tight grasp.

 She let go, as she always did with people she trusted and cared for.

 He undid the strings, admiring the artistry of his cousins to reveal a golden coloured note attached to the envelope.

 He spelled the letter to speak loud enough for only the two of them to hear…

Exultations to one and all, our esteemed family, friends and allies.

The event had arrived that which every proud, honoured father looks to, the marriage of our beloved granddaughter…

“Stop, please, no more…” she cried as she jumped down from the wall preparing to flee.

“Running away never solved anything, Ria” unspelling it.

“Would you be so cruel to make me listen?” a pleading in her voice.

He smiled kindly “Trust me on this.”

Ria stood with her back to him, waiting for the familiar, gruff tone.

4


The letter spoke... barely hearing the words till the last name. She turned back in shock, snatching the letter from his hand. No matter how many times she read or heard it, the name was a constant. The card fell to the floor from shaky hands...her thoughts forming and unforming at a dizzying pace. It could be true, her dark thoughts...
'He couldn't be..., could he?'
She heard Ced's calm voice in her head. 'There must be another explanation.'
'He will never break his promise unless...'
'I tried reaching T.C but it is too noisy here.'
She looked at him, words were unnecessary between them.
'I have arranged for us to leave in three days...but you still have your exams to clear.'
Swinging her legs, 'Later, these classes are not of much use in our world, are they?'
'Then why waste three years?'
'As if, you don't know the answer to that?'
'You could have enrolled with me. You had the grades.'
 'Just the grades, not the aptitude...can't atleast you see? I needed to get away from them all. Those pitying faces, they knew, they always did.'
 Ced shook his head sadly, pulling away from their connection, 'You are so wrong. They still wonder why you had to leave, if the letters to Ceci are anything to go by.'


5

Three of her classmated passed her by. One waved  as the other two stared at her cousin.

She waved back robotically, surprised at the extra grins directed at her. With the exception of Sarah, the girl who waved, they had never spoke more than a few words to her in all these years. They considered her odd, often laughing at her Indian accent.

She made no move to introduce him, as she watched with equal contempt.

Turning to him, “So what where you saying? Those things in common?” raising an eyebrow.

“For once, are as stubborn as you.”

She had to laugh at that.

Epilogue


Ali and Simi trudged up the slope... the others would have gathered on the top by now.

Ali looked at the plains in grim silence.

 Simi walked quietly beside, the ideal travel and sparring partner to her twin, though she was hard pressed as to why he didn't fly the carpet.

Reading his thoughts, “ This journey is as much for her as Shammi Uncle, isn’t it?”

He looked at her for a moment and responded, “ I promised to protect her and failed.”

“You saved her life…the healer says that her soul is lost in the void, not left her body yet.”

Ali smiled,a first in many months.

There were many sad eyed, happy faces that stared back at them.

“How is Ria?” asked T.C as a small group approached them.

“ The same since you  last visited.”

“Come children, change into your robes, the memorial chants begin shortly.”